so long, i'm gone.

so irritating.
is going home halfway during school to take care of my sick sister who has had a high fever of 39.5 degrees unusual?
totally ruined my impression of our nice-looking vp.
he looked at me as if i was speaking foreign language or smth.
said it was "not okay" to leave school halfway.
but because we are "compassionate" people and we all have families as welll.
whatever la you.
and ill shut my mouth up.

mrs koh is leaving. that's really sad.
my chem may just go down the drain.
and im missing her tutorial. her summary on a topic of wonderful chemistry which i totally don't uds. i must meet dahh ltr to get the summary from her. missing chem remedial somemore.
i hate missing lessons.

and somehow, why is it so difficult?
it isn't easy, and it requires really stepping out of my comfort zone.
and i don't know how to talk or get to you.
it does matter and yet its so difficult to do smth about it.
what do i do Lord
what do i do?

gosh. im ranting and ranting.
i hope it's just all pmsing and nothing more.
im getting irritated over things which are absurd;
wonderful general office.
i shall just do the stella-way of leaving sch nt time ive an emergency.
u want to know what tt is, ask me.
im not risking anybody posting my blog somewhere or anyone making an uproar about this kind of really stupid matters.

i come, quiet my soul
remember
redemption's blood
lead me to the cross
lord i lay me down
bring me to my knees
lord i rid myself
lead me to the cross
where your love poured out
lead me
lead me to the cross.


you were as i,
tempted and tried;
human.

argh. help me.
im desperate for you.

Labels: lead me.

1:36 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

little white shadows blink and glisten
part of a system.

it is scary how every thingg runs like clock-work,
goes on and on.
the days really fly past. and the people around you
mons and tues,
longest and most dreadful days.
mons are act quite slack but they somehow take up alot of my energy.
i guess having bio remedial doesn't help much with energy-saving.
coming back online seems all strange and foreign;
all quite time-consumin and a waste of time,
but it always sets me thinking about how much you really know about a person sometimes really.

will we ever get tired of the human race?
see it bleed on the new horizon.
stay with me, love.

oh do you ever get tired of hearing me complain and whine.
of all the gibberish thoughts and selfish emotions that run thru me.
it is hard to love,
but it all starts with loving you jesus.

listening to coldplay is so calming
and all the same it brings back so many memories.
good ones.

how do you really know a person?
reading their blogs, they often reveal their train of thoughts and kind of 'real' emotions?
and reading them and suddenly realising you never knew he/she thought like that hurts.
or it just seems like you thought you knew them really well and all of a sudden,
it seems all so unfamiliar.

tears stream down your face,
when you lose something you cannot replace.

and all the 'wows' of becoming THE GREEN MONITOR.
im not exactly looking forward to all the benefits this role is going to entitle me to.
or the great listing as top three achievements.

Caron Koh was proud to be a Green MoniTRESS in 06S32. She always faithfully switched off all fans, lights and air-conditioners in an effort to save the environment.

how great that sounds.
i'd rather have a song that goes "captain planet" or something.
haha ok it isn't all some torture or smth.
could be smth i could contribute to the school for?
laughs. okok but no matter how sucky or funny or SPASTIC it is, im going to give my best because
lord jesus you gave your best for me.


are you lost or incomplete?
do you feel like a puzzle you can't find your missing piece?

ohhs. sighs a great big sigh.
so take a picture and show me my future.
where will i be?
i don't know what to do.
the exams and tests that are drawing nearer?
lord im really scared and i feel so incomplete.
so unprepared and lost and whatever you might think when you're lost in the Sahara desert.
i don't know where to go and i want to talk.
talk to you.
spend time away with you my King.
my Beloved.

nothing's really making any sense anymore.
becuase when you're not in the picture,
everything else falls apart.
driven to distraction?
oh so many things that call out for my attention.
lord i want you and only you.


and all the homework i have;
tutorials to rush.
stuff to mug.
i want to love you but i don't know if i can.
i still know you hold my heart in your hands.
and im irritated by people who say i mug alot when i don't.
at least im not producing results laa can.
but im still going to fix my eyes on you and trust that
you will help me.

that the scene that plays on in my head during A's results release
will not come true.
its going to take alot for me to believe and work hard.
but if you believe in me
that changes everything

Labels: with thoughts and all; help me to love you.

5:54 PM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

you are my God my life my all
and i live for you alone
i am yours, evermore

oh chase my heart.
catch it.
never let it go,
when i run,
please, don't let me go.

i can never trust emotions.
i can never trust my own discipline,
i can never trust myself.
oh,

steal my heart away from me





oh lord when i think of
all you've done
my heart sings of your love
that saved my soul
and made me whole
my life is yours

cause you paid the price
i give you my life
im Yours

so no matter what the cost i will
go for you
no matter what it takes
im yours
because you paid the price at calvary
i give you my whole life
im yours

oh lord
my everything to you i leave
my heart and my soul
i live for you alone
im not my own
my life is yours

-pleanetshakers 'im yours'



in all my failings,
your grace is enough for me.
in all my inadequacies,
you are enough for me.

my heart is yours and yours alone,
forevermore.

missing all the booger time we had: GINNY AND CHARLENE.

you are all i ever wanted
all i ever need my jesus
take me to the secret place
teach me how to please you
all over again
teach me how to love you
from the bottom of my heart

you are all i need
my jesus
you're my everything

Labels: easter: the full extent of god's love and grace

12:04 AM

my heart burns for you'
you see past all my lies.

shout it out (:

-

all the brothers and sisters

-

of old.

-

credits.

-

wonderful people

-